Saturday morning my boy and I went on a long walk. Well, actually I guess it was more like the afternoon, since we spent the morning eating blueberry waffles and watching Trading Spaces. Anyway. We walked from my house all the way up Dolores to Market Street, then down Market to Van Ness. Walked around in the SOMA. Visited the totally deserted South Park, reminisced about the days back in ’98 when the place would be absolutely packed at lunchtime during the boom. Now the green grass grows long in the park, a sure sign of reduced traffic.

We had late lunch at Zeke’s sports bar, then walked to Pac Bell Park, which no I am not addressing as “SBC.” And then we took the train back home again. It was a nice day.

Sunday morning I got up and forced myself to get ready on time to attend a yoga class near Haight and Fillmore that is taught by my awesome hairdresser, whom I adore. True story. Brian came with me. Only seven people attended, which is perfect. It was a great 90 minutes, and included meditation at the end, so I felt quite energized afterward.

But later in the day I was back to being down and contemplative and afraid, again.

This depression has a terrible hold on me, but I am fighting it as hard as I can. I talked to my dermatologist’s office and they said I should stop taking the Accutane, fine by me. So I just threw out the last of my pills. I am going to continue practicing yoga to quiet my mind and get my body moving. I am going to see my old therapist tonight. And I am not going to flake on martial arts tomorrow. Promise.