washed, put away dishes
walked kona
watered garden
washed guest bedsheets
emptied vacuum canister
vacuumed house + furniture
took out recycling
emptied all wastebaskets
pick up dirty laundry from floor
clear off cluttered dresser
bathe kona
to do:
grocery shopping
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One of Kona’s favorite activities
We took her to Olympia yesterday. It was her longest ever car ride and she was very good, slept much of the way. When we got to town we had to leave her in the car while we went to lunch, poor baby. But after we ate we took her out and walked her around my old college town. She was pretty excited and freaked out about being in such a totally foreign environment. But overall was a very good girl as usual.
I visited my old pal Quitty at Orca bookstore. What a rad bookstore it is, too. I could spend a lot of time in there. Good mix of new and used, lots of obscure stuff, very large, and just a great vibe. I used to shop there when I was 19, too.
I was impressed by how (obviously) Olympia is a billion times cooler than the town where we live. For example, they have Indian food. In fact they have a huge variety of places to eat and drink and shop in the relatively tiny downtown. I didn’t appreciate Oly as much as I should have years ago; I was too young and dumb and obsessed at the time with retarded punk rock shit. But it’s a pretty awesome little college town, beautiful even. We should visit more often, and try next time to go when there *isn’t* a major fair or festival in town, as has accidentally happened to us the last two times we’ve gone.
Okay. I’m off to enjoy a hard-boiled egg, then clean the house a bit, and walk el puppo in the sunshine.
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We celebrated our four-year anniversary quietly last night at home. I didn’t even think anything at all was planned, which would have been okay, nevertheless Brian surprised me with making dinner and dessert, cleaned up the dishes, and even got me a lovely card which made me all misty. I love him. I wish I had done more for him, but I just pointed at my round belly and said, this is what I got you, pal. 😀
Booked my trip to San Francisco today. Spending three nights in mid-May, staying two nights with my also-pregnant friend Rena. I am so excited. And I’m going on my own, too! I haven’t been on a trip by myself in so long. Brian gets to stay home with the dog and play video games in his pajamas. And probably hang out with my dad, too. I need to make a list of things to do in SF. Like, get a pecan roll at Arizmendi. Get coffee at Philz by the ballpark. See all my friends. Sit in Duboce Park and look at the goggies and miss Konabear. Whee!!
Tomorrow, as part of our anniversary celebration and just because we never go anywhere, we are going on a little day trip to Olympia. I think it will just be a chance to take a long drive with Kona, to have some lunch, walk the dog around, maybe see someone I know (?), and then drive home. Not a big planned-out thing.
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I had a dream this morning that I went into this “maternity room” where a bunch of other pregnant women were sitting. When I walked in, one said, “are you pregnant?” I said yes, then she said, “no you’re not!” “Yes I am, I am fifteen weeks pregnant,” I replied. “Do you want me to take a test?”
Something about not showing yet, surely.
Later on we were brought a few large submarine sandwiches. I chose egg salad and covered mine with pickles. OMG.
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I am trying to see the bright side in all this, in the pain and discomfort I am in right now, the misery of my unending morning sickness, and the worse pain I know I am in for.
To put it into perspective, the baseball season just started a couple of weeks ago, and we are still at the point where people are saying “it’s a long season” and “it’s early” when a team gets off to a good or bad start. The baseball season will be nearly over by the time this baby comes. It lasts about six more months. All 162 games will have been played, and the playoffs will be underway. I don’t know what it will be like for me then, if I will be able to walk at all, or if there will somehow be a treatment for my pinched nerve that allows me some relief. God I hope so.
But then I think: it’s only six months, and my bulging disc saga went on for two years. There was no end in sight with that. With this, I can see the ending. And in the end there will be our child. I will forget this pain and the pain of labor when I see my baby at last. When he or she arrives, a wait of four long years will conclude. I will recover from birth and then I will proceed to lose the weight that is crushing my femoral nerve. I have already gained fifteen pounds and am the heaviest I have ever been in my life. I wonder if I had gotten this heavy without pregnancy, if this same symptom would have occurred? Probably not since I gain in my legs and butt, not in my waist.
I am trying to find comfortable ways to sleep. Can’t sleep on my back, the violent tingling starts within minutes. My uterus is at the front of everything, including this nerve, so laying on my back just makes the womb sit right on top of it. The worst pain is in my right hip, so no laying on my right side. I could lay on my stomach, but that won’t be comfortable for much longer. So I am left with my left side. It’s hard to lay still all night, it’s not what I do.
Anyway, I have been referred to a neurologist. That’s the best I can do. Maybe he will prescribe cortisteroid shots. Hey if it works and the baby is okay with it, fine. I need to raise my pain threshold anyway.
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link.
It sucks.
Treatment called for is mainly “weight loss.” Of course I will be doing nothing but gaining weight for the next six months. So this will only get worse and worse and possibly affect my ability to walk. HOORAY.
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Well, it finally happened. I started my day by rejecting the banana I had just finished eating. I have had morning sickness for about two months now, but this was the first time I actually threw up. Does this mean it’s getting worse? But I’m in the second trimester! WTF.
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You know, from the movie, “Alien.”
Kinda looks like it’s flipping us off here. Of course it had just been poked and prodded a bunch of times.
Adorable!!
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For a few weeks now I have been getting sick of my hair. It’s SO long and thick, and the last haircut I got (October?), she put many severe layers of differing lengths into it. Now it’s at the point where the back goes down to my bra strap and tangles easily underneath, and the front still hasn’t reached my chin. And every length in between.
The thing is, I don’t have the time (or the cash, really) to go get a good cut. The salon I’ve been going to charges about $50 or $60 for a cut. I knew I would just walk in there and point to a place in my hair and say “cut it below here, I am trying to even up the layers and remove some heaviness from the ends.”
But then the other day I was looking in the mirror, pulling at two sections of my hair over each shoulder, clearly seeing where it would be cut. It would be so easy… I mulled it over a few more days. It sure would be nice to save that $60.
Today I had just about had it. So after Brian went to class, I undressed and went into the bathroom, divided my hair into two sections, dampened it, and put elastics just below where I would make the cuts, like little pigtails at the very ends.
Then I cut five inches off on each side.
I spent a few minutes evening things out and adding some texture to remove the blunt look. I cleaned up the piles of hair on the counter and then took a shower, deep conditioning whilst shaving my legs. I could already feel how much lighter it was, and easier to comb.
I wrapped my head in a towel and put some lotion on my rounded belly (getting a jump start on stretch marks). Then I did a rough blow dry of my hair. It looks good. I really like it! And it was FREE!!
There was a time in my youth when I always gave myself haircuts. I wore my hair boy-short back then, so it was easy to just get some scissors and work all around my head until I was happy with my punkness. That stopped when I started wearing it longer.
No I’m not going to make a habit of this, but I knew what I wanted for right now was so incredibly simple that paying a lot of money for it, or any money at all, would be a big waste. So, yay for thrift.
Now I wonder what Brian is going to say…
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There’s a little creature inside me, six centimeters from head to tail. Its heart beats, it has a face, a brain, hands the size of lentils, complete with five fingers on each. We got a grainy black and gray glimpse of it today.
It lay in its warm lair inside me, hand near its mouth, opening and closing its tiny jaw. Its back arched, showing a delicate ribcage, transparent skin covering a quick pulse. A skinny leg kicked, unfelt yet by me. The probe on my belly moved to show the two hemispheres of the cranium, and the face, odd and skeletal and seeming to grin. The tech tried to provoke it to move, to show the back of its neck so she could measure its thickness. She prodded at me, and the creature bounced a little, then obligingly squirmed.
Five weeks ago, we looked upon this creature and saw a little peanut, totally formless except for a few beating heart cells and shadows of limb buds. Now it has bones, joints, organs, fingernails, a stomach. All that endless eating I’ve been doing has amounted to this little twitching being no larger than a mouse. We will see it again in two months and be able to use a gender pronoun after that. By then it will be regularly poking its toes into my bladder.
I think about it sometimes when I listen to this Spoon song (which is a cover). It took me several listens to this tune back in 2006 before I realized what he was singing about.
“Me and the Bean”
My eyes are opening again
I see you as you’re marching in
I’ll bring you cover when you’re cold
You’ll bring me youth when I grow old
Do you remember when you were small
How everybody would seem so tall
I am your shadow in the dark
I have your blood inside my heart
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